When I started my "What's on the line?" feature, it was just a novel way to share my old quilts, linens, etc. I never shared any real laundry until today. And that's what this is......real laundry, fabric that I washed and then hung on the line to dry..........
But this isn't just any fabric. This is fabric from my friend, Cindy Mark. A few weeks ago, I met my friend, Barb, for lunch and after that, I went on to another place. I planned to write about that other place sooner than this, but each time I'd start to do my post, I just couldn't seem to write what I wanted to write. And what I needed to write about was the place I went and something that I wished I didn't have to do but I did it because it was something my friend, Cindy, wanted me to do. Let me share, but just so you know, this is a long post...........
My friend, Cindy, passed away from pancreatic cancer in December of 2009. In one of our last phone conversations, she told me she wanted me to be the one who went through her fabrics after she was gone. I didn't like to think that would ever happen and just tucked that thought away. She had learned in October of 2009 of her cancer and less than two months, she was gone. Time passed and while I thought of Cindy often, I rarely thought about that wish to go through her fabrics. And then in August, Cindy's husband, Stephen, e-mailed and said that he and daughter, Kaite, were finally going through Cindy's things and he wanted me to know that Cindy had told him that I was to go through her fabric. I didn't realize that she had made her wish known to them but I was ready to honor that wish. And so, that afternoon after lunch with Barb, I drove up the familiar lane to Cindy's house, knowing she would not be there and feeling kind of sad. And as I got closer to her house, I was suddenly more sad because there were no chickens. Cindy loved her chickens and they added life to the place and laughter. And they were just a part of Cindy.
I parked my car, walked up and rang the bell. I could hear the bark of a dog and recalled times when Cindy would be the "dog-sitter" for our dog, Skeeter. Sometimes she had as many as four dogs and all her chickens and a cat or two and she would still take our Skeeter! Lotsa memories.
Stephen answered the door and led me downstairs to Cindy's sewing room. He works from home and said he had to get back to work but told me to take anything I wanted, except any vintage fabrics because Kaite wanted those and probably I should leave the Halloween fabrics for her, too. Cindy's favorite holiday was Halloween! He moved some boxes and things so I could more easily get at the fabrics. And about that time, there was a "bang" and the poster in this photo below fell over. We both laughed and Stephen said "Cindy's telling you she's here!" And you know, I did feel her presence. I wondered before I got to the house, what would it feel like to go through her things, but I knew she wanted me there and so it felt just fine.
It just didn't feel odd that I was there. It felt, if possible, very comfortable because I knew she wanted me there. It was a melancholy experience, though, because Cindy was only in her early 60's and way too young to die. And she loved her daughter, Kaite, dearly and her husband, her sister, her friends. She was full of life and had just completed her degree for her Master's in Women's Studies. She was teaching at the nearby Women's Reformatory and was so excited to share her gifts. She also enjoyed the arts. Maybe I should rephrase that...........she adored the arts and encouraged creativity in everyone!!! I thought of how she had encouraged me in my own career path and can honestly say that I wouldn't have done half the things I did in the last 12 years, had I not crossed paths with her. We had much in common, and yet we also had differing religious and political views but we both had a love of our kids, the arts.........and fabric, and we enjoyed time we spent together. :-)
All around her sewing room there were nooks and crannies full of many types of fabrics and supplies. Like most of us who enjoy sewing and crafting, there were plenty of threads, paints, rulers, buttons, etc. etc. etc. I found a basket and filled it with threads and some buttons, bits of rick rack. Then I began opening the drawers filed with fabric and the first drawer I pulled out held these pinks and browns...........
I thought of my own little stash of pinks and browns that I am collecting for a "someday" quilt. Those colors remind me of my Grandma Goldie. I don't need to search for any more pink and brown fabrics. :-) I put them in a bag and pulled out the next drawer..........
There were pretty yellows, pinks and greens and I loved them all. I was thinking that I had so much fabric at home, how could I find room for more? I added them to the bag. I opened every drawer in her sewing room and sometimes what I found surprised me. I knew we had similar tastes but she had many of the same fabrics I've purchased in the last twelve years. We didn't shop for fabric together very often but we did shop at some of the same shops. One place we both had shopped was the Ben Franklin store out in Wells, MN. Cindy would head out that way because she bought chicken feed at a store there. I went there when I made trips to Iowa because Cindy told me what great fabric the store had. She was right!
When I had gone through every drawer, I began going through fabrics on her bookshelves and this one really caused a lump in my throat...........
Chicken fabrics, lots of chicken themed fabrics!!! We were both collecting fabrics for a "chicken themed" quilt and this was her "chicken stash". I recognised many of the fabrics but there were many that I did not have. Cindy had big plans and I could look at those fabrics and know that she was planning for a whole variety of chickens and even a rooster or two. There were browns, reds, blacks that would be just what was needed for the chicken and roosters feathers. There were fabrics with eggs, and baskets and chickens and plaids and straw, even chickenwire fabric! The entire stack of chicken fabrics went in a bag. The top piece on the stack is a Rose and Hubble fabric titled "Flower Fairies". There were several yards of it and it is beautiful. Like me, Cindy bought lots of fat quarters and sometimes half yard cuts, but when we saw a fabric we really liked......it was "give me six yards" because you never knew what you might make and it could always be backing fabric!
When I saw this bin full of yarn, I recalled the dolls that Cindy designed and made.
They were called "Grandmere Sage" and each doll was a wise woman and her story was told on a little card that came with each doll. No two were alike, just like none of us are alike.
Cindy and I weren't anything "alike" but we were still friends. We often talked about how different we were and some folks, yes, wondered how we could be friends. She was from the East Coast, born in Maryland, lived in New Jersey. I was born in Iowa, lived a few interesting places in my life but most of it spent here in Minnesota. We had both been fortunate to travel. I learned things from her and she learned things from me. She was a wise and caring woman and I am sad that she is gone.
After I finished sorting through Cindy's fabrics, I took one last look around the room. This unfinished sundress made me wonder........was it something she was making for herself, or perhaps a dress for Kaite?
And then her thread wall.............
The picture of a much-younger Cindy with Kaite when she was just a toddler made me smile and yet it brought tears to my eyes. Just like it is as I type this. We all have this hope that we will grow old and watch our children grow and that life will go on. It just doesn't always work out that way.
When I got ready to put the bags in my car, Stephen helped me carry them out and load them. I told him I would use many of the fabrics in donation quilt projects, pillowcases, totebags for the women's shelter, samples for my quilt clases, etc. And I would also use some for Kaite. And, I told him there was significance in the number of bags that would make Cindy smile. There were thirteen bags (kitchen trash size bags) filled with fabrics, a nice
"Baker'sDozen". It was significant because the first class Cindy took from me was my "Baker's Dozen" beginner quilt class. And it was she, who encouraged me to offer such a class so that she and others could learn the basics of quilting. Yes, if I had never crossed paths with Cindy, I would not be doing so many things and probably woudn't even be blogging so you wouldn't be reading this! Yes, I am so thankful she was my friend!
As I drove home, the day was cloudy and kind of matched my mood but while I was waiting for a traffic light to change, the sky opened up and this brilliant sunshine shown through and it was just like a ray of sunshine, a smile from Cindy. I never quite know what to make of moments like this, but I take them for what they are........just a lovely moment in time.
I had one problem, though, ..........the fabric had been untouched and in a basement room for almost two years. It had a significant musty smell. When I got home, I "Googled" to see what could be done. I knew I had to salvage all this fabric. Vinegar and Oxy-Clean were listed as two ways to wash the fabric. And so, that's what I did. I began washing the fabric and using laundry soap, a large dose of vinegar and a big scoop of Oxy-Clean in each wash. Each load was washed once, then again. I started first with this small flannel bundle. The tag was still on it from a shop in Rochester, MN ........."All in Stitches". We went there together and I remember what a fun day we had. I washed them once, then twice and they came out beautiful and soft. They will be a baby quilt for Kaite in the event she one day marries and has children. I'll make the quilt and sew the love in it that Cindy would have also done.
When the weather was nice, I washed the fabrics and hung them out on my "between the trees clothesline". The ones shown in the first picture in this post, are some of the many fabrics we both bought but not while shopping together. We just liked the same stuff! We both loved the 50's and aprons and old tablecloths. We just plain loved fabric! As I washed the fabric, I would get right to it and iron it. I also wrote on the edge "Cindy" so I will know and remember. This stack here is Doreen Speckman fabric called "Provence". It said "Cindy" to me, more than almost any fabric I found in her sewing room. It will be a quilt for Kaite. Her dad knows this, but Kaite doesn't. :-)
When the weather turned cooler, I got out my old clothes rack that my mother gave me and put it to work. I washed by colors and am down to just three bags to wash......a bag of reds, a bag of greens, and a bag of blues/purples.
I will be able to salvage all of it!! I will put it to good use and Cindy would be happy to know that! She already knew that, though, and that's why she wanted me to have her fabric! Now, interestingly, just a few days before I got the e-mail from Stephen about Cindy's fabric, I had responded to a post on Victoria's
BumbleBeansBlog. I told her that I would donate a couple of quilts to
Basics, a New York based charity quilt drive. I had thought I would make a quilt in memory of Cindy. These are the fabrics that I chose from my stash. Cindy loved color and often would sport a strip of magenta in her red hair so these fabrics just said "Cindy".
I also plan to make a quilt in memory of my friend Cathy Wright, who died of breast cancer in July of 2009. This is a picture of Cathy with a donation quilt that she made the summer of 2008. We had a sewing day when we made quilts for Iowa flood victims and this was her contribution.
Cathy loved her family, cats and quilting. I offered to make a cat themed quilt for Cathy and had begun to collect squares of fabric from our common quilting friends. But there wasn't enough time to finish it before Cathy passed away. Last year, I added more cat-themed fabrics and thought that one day I must finish it. I had my squares and that crazy colorful cat fabric that I'll use for borders..........
and then in the fabrics I brought home from Cindy, I found that perfect pink floral that I needed for the cat quilt in memory of Cathy. It will be the first fabric used for a donation quilt that comes from Cindy's stash. And then I'll make more. Some will go to
Basics and some will be made into quilts for the Crisis Nursery and some into totebags for a nearby Women's Shelter. And some will be used for samples for my quilt patterns. And lots of the fabric will be donated for use by students in a beginning quilt class I'll be offering at our Henderson Library sometime this coming winter. I would rather that Cindy could have used this fabric but she would be glad knowing it will be put to good use in so many ways! What seemed like it might be a sad task will have a good ending.
This wasn't an easy post to do. My hope would be that Cindy would have liked what I wrote. I asked Stephen if it was okay to write about her and he said, "for sure, she would have loved it". I miss Cindy. I miss her e-mails. She had lovely smile and a great laugh. So did Cathy. So did my friend, Dorothy, who passed away from cancer this past spring. I'll make a quilt in memory of her, too. And, maybe, as I make the quilts, the sadness that I feel at their passing will be released and will lead to joy for someone else who dearly needs a quilt that says "Love". And that's the best that can be done for now.
Make this a good Monday!!
Sandi
